From World’s Biggest Wimp to Trying Anything
March 20, 2008
Most people who know me now would never believe what a wimp I was when I first started riding. I was scared to try anything out of my comfort zone. I mean anything. Horses acting up made me nervous. The simple thought of cantering made me nervous. Putting a halter on made me nervous. Leading a horse by myself made me nervous. For that matter, doing anything around horses by myself made me nervous.
And it probably really grated on the nerves of my fearless horsewoman mother.
At the same time, my mom pushing me to do more despite my whining and sobbing (literally) was probably one of the best things she ever did for me.
I was nine years old the first time she convinced me to try a canter. I’d pretty much been riding my whole life and was quite comfortable at the walk, sitting trot, and posting trot. Smoke and I had a successful first canter transition, and an incredibly successful first canter. So mom decided to have me try it without stirrups.
I was feeling confident about it … until I fell off. And boy was I mad at her!
I refused to canter for months after that.
Eventually I got over it (I’m sure she made me get over it), and cantering wasn’t a big deal any more. But it was the same battle at first about learning to jump. And handling horses who weren’t standing still as statues. And picking feet. And learning to ride different horses.
But mom pushed me through it. And to my amazement, I survived. Mom was really good at pushing me to do what she knew I could handle, even if I thought I couldn’t.
Many years later, I became the teaching and barn staffer who would ride or handle any horse. I’m smart enough to be careful, but brave enough and experienced enough to handle most anything. And I think that combination of caution and confidence made all the difference in the world.
I’ve always felt like the climax of this transition was schooling a draft cross named Dale over fences.
We were visiting my mom’s best friend Carolyn, who manages the Riding Center in Yellowsprings, Ohio where my mom grew up and learned to ride. We’d always ride while we were there, and by this point I was beyond the lesson horses and Carolyn always put me on the ones who needed schooled (see, told yah mom worked the wimpiness out of me!).
Like I said, Dale is a draft cross, and he is much more draft than whatever the cross part is. He had a big,slow, lumbering way of going that was suprisingly balanced and agile over fences.
I was riding him, and mom and Carolyn decided to that I was the perfect guinea pig to ride him while we tested him to see how high he could jump. So we started out low and kept setting it higher and higher and higher. It’s no show jumping height, but we made it up to 3 foot 6 inches before we quit. And he was still doing that comfortably.
I’d rarely jumped much higher than 3 feet, so jumping the highest I ever had on a relatively unfamiliar horse was a huge difference from the wimpy 9-year-old I used to be.
Posted in Jackie's Thoughts, Riding and showing, Women and Horses
March 20th, 2008 at 6:23 pm
It’s good to know that you now appreciate being pushed. I wish I could get my kids out of their bedrooms and into a saddle, but they have no interest in horses. My son enjoys cleaning stalls, though! Go figure. I haven’t intentionally tried jumping yet, but Lostine took me by surprise one day by jumping over a piece of wood. I’ll never forget the feeling of exhilaration knowing that I was on the back of a horse that jumped when I didn’t know it was going to jump, and I automatically adjusted my balance and stayed on.
March 20th, 2008 at 6:59 pm
That is an AMAZING picture. And I am glad that there are other sucessful horse people in the world who started out as weenies like I did. It is a good thing your mom was the one that pushed you…my mom was the one that always made me nervous! I still can’t get over what a cool picture that is! I am glad you got your nerve and kept your common sense!
March 20th, 2008 at 9:37 pm
I’m glad that you appreciate my having pushed you. As a mom, I always worried that I pushed too hard at times but… I’ve always been proud of you, not just for your many accomplishments but more importantly for the woman of faith and integrety that you have become. Thanks for brightening my day…Love you!
March 21st, 2008 at 12:15 am
As I’m reading this I have to keep thinking about me pushing my granddaughter. I sure hope she decides someday that it was worth it. I think that picture is very impressive. That horse is massive in substance.
March 21st, 2008 at 7:59 am
Nuzzling Muzzles - hey, if nothing else, at least you’re getting some barn work out of it. If you could combine your son (who only likes barn work), and MiKael’s granddaughter (who only wants to ride), you’d have the perfect horse kid!
On the Bit - Thanks! That’s always been one of my favorite picture of me jumping. And I’m glad to know too that I’m not the only weenie around here.
Mom - No regrets! Thank you for pushing me like you did … it made me tough, brave, and confident. Love yah!
RisingRainbow - I very much hope the same thing for you! Fortunately, we keep growing up and many do grow out of those difficult teenage attitudes, so I have lots of hope for you and your granddaughter. I’ll be sure to check back in on your blog in about 10 years and see if she appreciates it yet.
And Dale is massive. I’m 5′8″ with pretty long legs, so for a horse to still look that big underneath me means he’s pretty huge…
March 21st, 2008 at 10:17 am
Way to go!!
March 21st, 2008 at 7:54 pm
It is so nice to see that you and your mom have a great relationship and have horses in common. My middle daughter and I share the same love of horses and riding, while my eldest is a good rider and she has a horse at the farm she never really caught the bug, but she does enjoy a ride once in a while, and my son forget it, he had a few lessons as a teen, fell off once (face first in the mud) put the horse away left the barn and never looked back. So all kids are different. Even if their mom is a little horse crazy it doesn’t always rub off on the offspring.